Friday Funny

Star Wars fans are back at the humor post, attempting to sort the pieces of what might end up being a totally plagiarized plot. What's the connection between Kylo Ren and Rey?!?

"Obi-Wan was having an affair with another Jedi. When Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan in 'A New Hope', he recovered Obi's lightsaber. Luke lost his light saber when he lost his hand in the Cloud City. Luke recovered Obi's lightsaber upon killing Darth Vader at the end of 'Return of the Jedi'. Obi had twin daughters Miley Cyrus (just kidding) and Rey. In "Revenge of the Sith", Yoda's eyes turn slightly yellow battling Palpatine, meaning Yoda knew the dark side and withheld it from Anakin. Obi-Wan may have known the dark side from Yoda which is why Anakin, the most powerful Chosen One, could not beat Obi-Wan. Luke was taught the dark side by Darth Vader in the back story after 'The Empire Strikes Back', which is why he shows up in black in 'Return of the Jedi'. If kylo is Obi's son, Luke may have tried to teach both the light and the dark side to Kylo Ren, which would explain why Luke stood in that same exact spot for years (except to take a poop but going right back to regret position), and spent years with extreme regret." - Lynx

"Is the connection that they both can't act?" - Darkstar

"Brady and Belichick are the last Jedi... I had my suspicions, but after that football comeback, I have no more doubts." - Yahoo Reader

"As long as he doesn't fall for her and then find out in the last movie he is related to her, all will be well." - J

"Obviously she's Jar Jar in disguise." - Dev

"She's a clone." - Sai T

"Rey is D.B. Cooper. Rey shot J.R. Rey is Jack the Ripper. Rey was the Babushka Lady in Dallas. Rey defiantly stood her ground in Tienanmen Square. Rey was the man in the Iron Mask. Rey is all of the missing Romanov children. Rey is Keyser Soza! You're welcome." - Charles

"Their wands have the same core. They can wound but not fatally harm one another." - Jonathon

"Dark Helmet: Before you die, there is something you should know about us, Lone Starr.
Lone Starr: What?
Dark Helmet: I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
Lone Starr: What's that make us?
Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become." - Charles

"Everyone knows Rey is the offspring of Leia and Chewie. She has to keep nearly completely covered to hide her fur." - Tracy

"Well... Han Solo was gone for a very long time and a bit of playboy..." - Brandon

"Kylo and Rey both are reincarnations of Anakin. The conflict in Anakin between the Dark and the Light is spliced in two individuals. They are the two sides of Anakin Skywalker's soul." - Free Mind

"They both stared in the Jar Jar Abrams horrific copy-and-paste hack job called The Farce Awakens, worst Star Wars movie ever." - .

"The real question here is... is Frank West dead or not?" - The

"In order for the Force to Awaken, Disney must go back to sleep." - C

"Bunch of scruffy-looking Nerf herders." - Spahetti Westerner

"Oh no, let me guess. They are brother and sister, and the bad guy is their father. Wow, real original. Can't believe space nerds gobble this regurgitated plagiarism up and beg for more as they run around smacking each other with their space nerd rods." - MyDogIsHappy

"In the novel, when the lightsaber goes flying into Rey's hands, Ren says, "It *IS* you!" (italics in the text). Ren clearly knows Rey. She also muses to herself that he seems to know more about her than she does. While that line was not in the movie, none of this is any surprise to anyone who has read the novel. Why news stories on this topic never mention the novel is beyond me, because it's right there." - Janet

"This isn't rocket science, clowns. If it were, it would be Star Trek, the thinking man's franchise. Oh, calm down. It's a joke, basement dwellers. Relax. Put your light sabres on stun." - Captain

"Look... regardless of which sci-fi series you prefer, there's only one man who could have fathered everybody in the universe... James T. Kirk." - DarkerHumorist

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